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No regrets

I live by the rules of 'No regrets' these days. As I've told you a million times before, I'm a huge fan of analyzing and finding out what I really want is actually quite easy this way. Simply chose the path that you'd regret not taking.

I've made my share of mistakes, some stupid decisions, bad ideas I acted upon, but ever since 'No regrets' is the one constant in my mind, I do things the way I want to do them. Even though I still make do things wrong, of course, sometimes even knowingly.

Just say 'Screw the consequenses' and live. No matter whether the consequenses really are horrible. At least you followed your inner voice. If it says "but I want to...", then let it lead the way. But don't regret things. Regrets ruin the glory that is life.

I'm also angry. Finally. I might have mentioned it before, but I'm fucking grateful for it. Finally breaking through the passivity. Anger feels divine. I don't know why anybody does drugs.

Other than that... News about my life: I bought a hat. It's really cool and I'm so in love with it I wear it every minute I'm allowed to (not in class).

I'm in the middle of rehersals for two plays.

I HATE SCHOOL! No fucking energy left to deal with that as well as the rest of my problems and things to do. I'm tired. No, exhausted. And real life is messy and weird. And perhaps maybe the closest thing to a real life I've ever had.

And I'm going to shut up now. This is ridiculous. Have you noticed I've lost all my eloquence? My phrases are all gone. I only use the simplest stuff I can think of for there is no space in my head for more complicated ones.

12.9.08 16:03
 


bisher 1 Kommentar(e)     TrackBack-URL


Ronald (15.9.08 18:04)
Well, I guess after a long time it is finally the opportunity to address you again (even though you obviously forgot to mail me) on your own site. I don´t want to teach you or oppress (not even try to, haha) you. Looking back some 10 years (damn, I´m OLD), I can still se clearly all the chnaces that have passed meby and I did nothing but waving at them and hope there would be even better ones... but you feel it, there weren´t. So do what you feel is positive. and forget about it? Not reaqlly. Whenever you state anything about horrible consequences, you know the limit. We have to make compromises every day, every night, every single moment in life. Well, I don´t like it ( and you neither. But playing reqiures rules sometimes; and we know how to act upon without getting to prominent in it.
I made a load of wrong decisions in my life, some of which I really regeret as well, but this is over and not valid any more. Look to the future and see whats coming up. Perspectives are always bright when you see them, and blimey, there is a lot. As I said in the beginning, I don´t wanna teach you or preach about the good life. Just to give my opinion to somebody who seems to understand... means a lot to me too.
Anyway, I suppose next we meet, we should have a drink or two and speak a little about this tacky and cozy life and its chances to be in it. Good idea? Hope this time you let me know!

see ya then, Ron

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